Dadcorating: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Lamp

As we have stated before on Stunt Dad, kid's room decor sucks. My kids are not the typical puppy and rainbow kinds of kids...and dammit, I don't want them to be. The last thing I want to see when I go into  their room at night is a 5 foot Dora on my daughters bed or a wall of happy animals leering from across the room. So what is a dad to do? Start dadcorating!

Dadcorating can be defined as taking anything that you think is cool and modifying it to fit into your children's life (or better said...anything you think is cool, but your wife won't let you put up in your house).

Our first Dadcorating project for you is something I think any father that was raised in the 80's would appreciate: a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Lamp.


This is a really simple project. You will need:

• A large Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle action figure (you can find these at garage sales or on e-bay for around $10)

• A bottle lamp kit

• A can of white glossy spray paint

WARNING! THE FOLLOWING INSTRUCTIONS ARE SUPER SOPHISTICATED AND SHOULD ONLY BE ATTEMPTED BY A TRAINED PROFESSIONAL. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED! (Not really. Any schmuck with a drill and a thumb can pull this one off.)

1. Take the Ninja Turtle and pull his head off. Discard the head or your children will find it and question why you killed Donatello. 
2. Drill a hole into the back of the turtle. Be sure the hole is small enough that the cord from the lamp kit goes in tightly. 
3. Snake the cord up through the neck and be sure that it fits smoothly. 
4. Take the cord out, go to a well ventilated place (or not if you like to get high off of spray paint, but you shouldn't...you are a dad and doing drugs is setting a bad example you freak), and spray paint the headless turtle with the the high gloss spray paint. 
5. Wait for it to dry and put another layer on. You want it to be candy polish white when you are done. 
6. Once it is dry, insert the cord, connect the cord to the area where the bulb goes in (I am not a trained electrician...the round thingy). I removed the cardboard piece and place the round thingy directly into the neck. It should fit perfectly. 
7. Now all you have to do is add a bulb and voila...You have your very own Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle lamp...Total cost around $25 (maybe a little more if you use an Edison bulb to make it real fancy schmancy). 

Here is the final product in all of its glory.

So what do you think? Do you have any ideas for other dads that are looking to decorate their kid's room? Let us know in the comments below. Keep coming back for more Dadcorating ideas. 

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